Thread: [sic] - Part II
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Old 13-03-2008, 09:34 AM
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Question Re: [sic] - Part II

You could have added more scenery to the dialogue. What were you and mom doing as you prepared for the funeral? Throw some clothes about. Scratch at your hair. Toss the black shirt about? Where’s the tie?

For me the funeral could have been more elaborate with details; physical attire of the attendees, their emotional actions and reactions with their interactions of other attendees. Where’s the consoling priest? Where’s dad? This cousin what makes her so attractive? Is grandpa at peace in his coffin? Or did his disease take a great effect on his body?

It’s just the detailed person in myself that wants to ‘see’ more. Apologies.
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