Thread: Touched
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Old 19-03-2008, 01:52 AM
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Re: Touched

A pretty strange story but very original. It was like somebody drugged his drink or something. That would stink. You have to have spaces between some of the paragraphs though.

I think this is wrong:

Quote:
I should be probably getting back to the village soon.
shouldnt it be: I should probably be getting back to the village soon.? just switch the be and probably around thats it. Overall it was pretty good. It gave me an eerie sense of fear.
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