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Re: Weeping Unto the Dark...
This was great, lub. The flow, and rhythm and rhyming - it fit together like a puzzle pieces. But, I found one gramer fix - last stanza, 4th line.
Quote:
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She vanishes, withdraws to her minds tomb
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shouldn't it be, mind's tomb? Since youa re talking about her mind?
__________________
"But words are things, and a small drop of ink,
Falling, like dew, upon a thought, produces
That which makes thousands, perhaps millions, think."
- Lord Byron
Last edited by BookWhale***; 04-01-2006 at 05:12 AM.
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