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Old 31-08-2007, 03:41 AM
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Re: Creative Writing

Pretty funny stuff Aleox. I wasn't at all sure where this story was going at first. Interesting and humorous twist at the end.


"...and Mr. Garfunkle locked his eyes on her trembling ones"

This line is a bit confusing; it took me a second read to figure out what 'ones' was referring too. Might want to rephrase.
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