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Old 11-10-2007, 07:30 AM
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Re: Along Came a Stranger - Part 3

I don't necessarily think that the Spencer needed to have close of a connection with Orion. I think it's enough for Orion to believe it was there, although I do agree that it would help if they were better friends, I just don't think that its completely necessary. Ambrose I really liked your story. There are mechanical/grammatical things that need a bit of work, but JirQuest has them lined out pretty well. Another thing I thought was a bit strange was Ricky's uncle attempting to drown Orion in the sink....Orion mentions that he was psychic, but there has got to be a better way for him to try and stop Orion from killing more people if he truly was psychic. Overall, fantastic story, I liked it a lot. I look forward to reading more of your work!
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