Thread: Flying Low
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Old 25-10-2007, 08:53 AM
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Re: Flying Low

Beautiful and melancholy. I'm more prone to interpret this figuratively (as someone clinging on to a dead relationship, etc.) so whether that was your intention or not, I still really enjoyed it! Description and word choice are great, but I do have one minor picky detail.

Quote:
Everything around her
Have been burned
Or broken
Shouldn't 'have' be 'has'? Still, wonderful work on this.
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The fog comes
on little cat feet.
It sits looking
over harbor and city
on silent haunches
and then moves on.
-Carl Sandburg
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