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Re: Shadows
"...pressure crammed in from without by all the chains..." - I don't get it :'(
Okay, Although the beginning of the story was a little bit confusing and just a bit more redundant, the story in itself was really cool! Very original, very creative.
As for the redundant parts, what you could have done is dropped the JRR Tolkien writing style, (Where one utilizes more description than story) and gone with more of an actiony based plot line; short sweet and to the point.
Honestly, I don't think that you had to go that in depth with the main character and his mental status. Just a few lines of who he was and what he was feeling would have been acceptable, rather than a few paragraphs.
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The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear. The oldest and strongest fear is fear of the unknown. -H.P. Lovecraft
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