Thread: The Time Traveler's Chamber
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Old 31-10-2007, 03:22 AM
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Re: The Time Traveler's Chamber
I loved it. I think it could be longer with a bit more character development, but that is a personal choice. A few more lines to give a bit more insight into the characters would pull me, personally, into them a bit more. In that way, when the go to 'Hell' it would create more of a terror and tension that would be released in the final paragraph.

Like I said before, I loved this piece. If you did not change a thing, I would still love it.

Great job.

Otto
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