Re: Dorianna
You have her in the first paragraph telling her story then later on she tells her story again to her grandmother. So who was she telling her story to in the house?
I would have it turn into something like her mother drank from the eternal spring and the other lady had issue with it, turning into an epic battle and her mother being "dead" but in the end is really trapped between this world and the next forcing her daughter to save her immortal soul....
Hope I helped.
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