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Re: The Gathering
You should really go back and reread your stories...Look over all the quotes and make sure you did them right..you should also make the speech flow better. A story can be told with speech alone, so you do not need to keep saying who said what...You also have a lot of 'and' s in your writing...make better transitions..you can do that by simply taking out most of your ands in your story...Other than that I think it is good...
Keep it up Raymond
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