[Sime Sheef]

They have big heads, big, sparkling eyes, slender, feminine, bodies, pointy chins, outlandish hair and if not absent, small noses, ears and mouths. What does this describe? Why, the people of Japan, of course; and we Americans know this fact because of the dyslexic books they send over for our enjoyment. I theorize that they send the books here to brainwash our youth and if not, to make up for their transgressions(1). If you have ever read, more accurately, viewed, manga, which according to Microsoft(c) Works 2000 isn’t a word, you would know that it is a comic written by adult drama queens and kings, and sci-fi/ fantasy writers who are obsessed with magic. You would also know that manga is drawn to accurately represent the Japanese people in every aspect of life, including their huge eyes. If you have never read manga and didn’t know these things already, you do now. Also for you who have never had the great honor of looking at black and white images of pointy-chinned fat headed people with symbols for eyes, I warn you that manga comes from the minds of people very different than yourself, unless you’re a secluded Japanese, and that reading these comic books might effect the way you act and think; and you better start learning Japanese, because most novels are full of Japanese symbols.

According to American scholars, whose insignificant title makes them sound intelligent, manga has two roots, man and ga. Man, by lengthy searching and prolonged studies of the history and creation of the Japanese language, was revealed to mean man, pronounced “mea-in” by the general public, but because of people unfamiliar with the creation story(2), man must be translated as “man or woman” or “a person”. Ga is a word used by babies universally meaning “random words”(“blah” in adult tongue) or “childish”. Therefore, according to our brilliant scholars, manga means “people with random words” or “childish people”. Fortunately our scholars are so intelligent, without knowing it (in fact, no one knows it), that they failed to look at the definition of manga in the Japanese dictionary and have consequently given us a second definition that is very similar, assuring us of its true meaning. According to Wikipedia, the very unreliable source(3), manga is directly translated from Japanese as “random (or whimsical) pictures”. This information can most likely be found on any other site but because Wikipedia is mostly written by regular people who are probably fanatics about what they are submitting and not “professionals”, it’s considered by teachers universally, even those who submit to it, to be unreliable, revealing how little teachers can be trusted. The two definitions of manga are very similar and accurate; there might be a small difference but the overall ideas are the same, especially when you consider that before there were “pictures” of slender people with big eyes and pointy chins, you had the real “people” to look at.

For the average American a manga novel is harder to understand as a whole than the songs of the flying buffalo(4). The reason for this awfully strange phenomena is that manga novels are written backwards, further explaining why they may totally reverse the way you think. Most manga novels are also in black in white due to their extreme lengths ,which is made possible by the poor style that the cartoons are drawn in. Like, basically, in a nut shell, manga is really, just pretty much a big scandal(5); manga is an industry with a huge output but hardly any input. Even the plots lack evidence of any planning, thought, or detail.

I do not believe that manga has to be of such poor quality; the art in my opinion, besides the cheap way of showing a characters emotion, by making their heads big and making their eyes symbols, isn’t that bad. Manga art is a lazy way of drawing a comic (I mean, how hard is it to draw a background!) but if it can be done right than it would be just as good as any other comic. Other than the art, the books need to be read the American way, the backwards fad is over, it’s not that cool anymore; they need to be a little more creative in their plots and characters, if I wanted to watch a drama than I would look up during school; and cut out the random Japanese symbols, we aren’t Japanese. Wait, what did you say? Yaoi(6)? Don’t even get me started!

[BrokenParadox]

You know I hate this one.
Don't get me wrong, it is still written very well. I like it, though it's harsh to my favorite type of books. ^_^

[Masa]

Hehe, a very analytical view on manga. You've really allowed me to see things on the other side, but I have but one tiny problem, "the backward fad" isn't a fad, I really read that way in almost every book... unless it's an English book, cause then I'd look like a moron.

However you've done some research, well done, even though I'm not going to say I agree with you completely.

[Sime Sheef]

I understand. It was an overexageration. I understand that's the way they read, if that's what you mean. You read japanese?

Simeon

[Masa]

Do I read Japanese? I am Japanese... or was that question not directed to me?

[Serac]

lol, as funny as it is, its a little insulting. I was thinking of poor Masa when reading this, knowing he may have a few things to say about it.

btw, funny serac, funny.

[Sime Sheef]

Wow, that's awsome Serac. I wonder how well the character's are drawn. Looks like they might be pretty good.

Remember people, it was just an easy topic for a satire. I like alot of Manga styles. Even though, sometimes it just seems like a big fad for people to get involved in. At least at my school. It's meant to be humorous; not to insult.

And I am sorry Masa but I didn't know that.

Simeon

[Masa]

Don't you worry Sime Sheef, I don't get insulted unless you call me a few key words that my years of anger management chose to just give up on. And I'm not going to tell you those words. But I understand and enjoy you expressive views on this viewpoint and know what you're talking about.

And Serac... sweeeet....

Thanks for thinking about poor Masa, Duncan, a little creepy, but thanks anyway, glad to be in yor thoughts... you know there's some sick stuff in here... was that a man made out of marshmallow? On fire? Hm, the mind of a musician...

It is a dark treasure kept aptly under lock and key.

[Masa]

Quite true of course, mustn't have marshmallow people running about in your mind on fire, under lock and key! Rightly so!

[tranquildrifter]

... I have been staring at this for a while now... I am not sure how funny this could be under any circumstances... America! *sigh* --- Serac's post is the best part so far...

[angel]

... I have been staring at this for a while now... I am not sure how funny this could be under any circumstances... America! *sigh* --- Serac's post is the best part so far...

all i can say is i totally agree

[BrokenParadox]

How is this a fad at our school??
Only a select few actually read this in school. You should know that! There's me, Panda, Ash, let's see three....four....five.......si x? There are six (at most) that read manga at our school, Sime.
And since when do you like a lot of manga styles? You still haven't told me whether you liked Kare Kano or not...*sniff sniff*
You need to read some. You'll see how addictive it is. ^_^

[tranquildrifter]

Originally Posted by BrokenParadox

How is this a fad at our school??
Only a select few actually read this in school. You should know that! There's me, Panda, Ash, let's see three....four....five.......si x? There are six (at most) that read manga at our school, Sime.
And since when do you like a lot of manga styles? You still haven't told me whether you liked Kare Kano or not...*sniff sniff*
You need to read some. You'll see how addictive it is. ^_^

Hmm... I may be out of line (as this is not a substantive post) but that is pretty funny

[Masa]

I enjoy some manga... but Shingo is the only otaku in my family. Of course my school is much more oblivious, we have maybe three, but they're so hardcore it's scary... I have a lad in cosplay at least once a week. Imagine going to school with a guy wearing a Naruto costume once a week, yeah it gets a little frightening...

[BrokenParadox]

Haha, that would rock...but I can see your point. ^_^
By the way Td, I know Sime personally so yeah...mwahaha
I'll force you to read them Simeon!! *evil grin*

[luckme10]

Finally! Someone who truly understands manga! Sheds a small tear of joy... Although, I believe there are a few descriptive characteristics to consider..
To quote the great Margaret Cho, "Oh, I'm not Asian... I'm just really tired." Here Margaret Cho is noting that she is actually Asian, and is not just really tired, in fact, she has narrow eyes. Thus, it is true that Asians, are at a genetic disposition with constricted vision, seeking to displace their complexes onto fantasy projections of the ideal man. This manifests itself the form of holla-hoop sized eyeballs.
A similar logic may be considered with the choice of hair styles that defy the laws of physics and hair colors which, unlike the predominantly black haired Asian, utilize the full frequency of colors in the electromagnetic spectrum.

Unfortunately, they have gone too far. In attempting to satiate the global market, animation companies have decided to test out a new kind of subliminal marketing. This form of marketing was brought forth to global shores in the show roughly translated to, Portable Bringers of Demonic Powers." The show was later renamed Pokemon by the Media Industry. In 1997, the during the testing of this new weapon on the local population was proficient in causing epileptic seizures to over 700 susceptible children. It's effects, despite all attempts of denial by the Japanese government, were leaked out in this well established video footage. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=InHzie7xJjY

[Sime Sheef]

Bravo! A true fellow Satiwriter! You understand intended exageration and see the same strange "coincidences". Amazing how you can post a response and create a piece of satire.

Hmm...Satiwriter...I like it. What about backwards?...Retirwitas...no.. ...