I loved it. I went to see an award winning children's poet at my university and she read her poems to us. I can honestly say yours was better than a lot of the ones she read. It was honest, funny and so lively. No child would get bored reading it and I must confess neither was this adult. That was a great piece of work. Keep it up.
Lol - glad everyone enjoyed it. I can honestly say, very little work went into this piece but I did later fix a couple of wording issues when I thought about seriously posting it.
~blushes~ Again, thanks for the wonderful comments
I can see how this would work. People think that writing for children is easy. Did you ever see the episode of Black Books where they tried to write a children's book?
No - but I have always enjoyed children's stories and poems. I never really ever tried to write them but I might try and focus on that aspect a bit more. Stretch my ideals/talents out side of my normal box
I'm sorry to hear that Ravane has died. To say that he was like a friend to me is to say the least. In fact, he was more like a father figure. The father of the father of Stories Mania.
I was trying to to find a poem to read to my four year old niece and stumbled across this one. She loved it! I wonder what it is about his type of lyrical quality and rhythm that appeals to children so much?
Oh, I just loved this. Inspired me to try my hand at a poem for children. I have a feeling that writing poetry for children will have the affect of bringing a little of the magic of childhood back into the writer of the poem.
Enchanting and filled with much Particulars as are the lives of children. What is the rule of repeating when writing any poem even if they are for children too?
hello,
IT is "childishly" beautiful, I just like it ! something like tictoc ryhtm that reminds us of our childish interests games and laughs when we were still kids. Good job Ryankia
this is really good! would have no qualms reading this to children, better than most published childrens writers! Dances along at a great pace and has great variation in sound to keep a child interested, plus useful for making funny noises at them! great work.
It's the "example" if you will of the section....and what a great one it is. Welcome back.
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"Snip! Snap! Snip! the scissors go;
And Conrad cries out - Oh! Oh! Oh!
Snip! Snap! Snip! They go so fast;
That both his thumbs are off at last.
Mamma comes home; there Conrad stands,
And looks quite sad, and shows his hands;-
"Ah!" said Mamma "I knew he'd come
To naughty little Suck-a-Thumb." - The Story of Suck-a-Thumb, Heinrich Hoffman
Awesome poem. I really love the way it rhymes. It is very musical. Great poem. I have seen your other poems as well. It appears you are a natural poet.
Wow I enjoyed this one as well! The close proximity of the rhyme did not even turn me off but rather rolled right off my tongue in a very upbeat tempo. I can picture little kids skipping and reciting this one. Nice work! (and great color selection).
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"Money doesn't talk, it swears." -Bob Dylan
"Expect nothing. Live frugally on surprise." -Alice Walker
"I don't know if I can live on my income or not - the government won't let me try it." -Bob Thaves
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wordsmyth
See I'm not worried at all. Bri would save the alcohol and her wolfman in the process.
Aw, cute. It's exactly what a children's poem should be, it's charming and has bounce. I agree with Syrah though, that line "no sound do children holler" messes with the flow, which until then was great. The repetition also works really well, adding to that bouncy quality. Great!
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Your battles inspired me - not the obvious material battles
but those that were fought and won behind your forehead.