[Nephilim]

Faction
by Alec Hodgman

Synopsis: This was inspired by the novel 1984 by George Orwell. It takes place in the same city and time, but follows two characters that were left out of the original novel. This also has much more action and grit than the original book.



It was a Friday, December 9th, in the 1989th year of Big Brother, or so said Big Brother, and I and my roommate Tyler had just returned to our flat in the hell's kitchen of Oceania from a night guarding and patrolling the perimeter walls of our all but fair community of Big Brother. Tyler went to the kitchen to cook our dinner as I entered the bathroom for a shower. Two tired red eyes looked back at me in the mirror.

"God, I can't wait to quit this job."

I heard Tyler chopping bread in the kitchen. The intentionally silent sound of our door opening sparked my first suspicions that something may be wrong. The second action confirmed it as a saw a Mark-84 stun grenade, lovingly nomenclatured as the "flashbang", sail onto the floor just outside the bathroom. Being trained in recognition and reaction to these situations, I quickly grabbed my Big Brother-issued Kevlar vest dove onto the ordinance, covering the explosive while yelling to Tyler the call that we feared but prepared for every day, "We're blown!"

Tyler and I had been part of an underground faction that instigated guerrilla attacks on Big Brother's soldiers and supply convoys. We both agreed that it would be best to work as soldiers for Big Brother as well, since it would remove suspicion and allow us access to knowledge that would prove beneficial in our attacks. In the split seconds before the flashbang exploded, I rationalized that there had to be a mole in the faction. But who could...?

The vest absorbed the blast, but the force propelled me from the ground backward like a rag doll, back into the bathroom. Then the footsteps came. Red Soldiers, they were called. Their sound was infamous, no speech but a trampling of heavy boots were heard as they patrolled the streets of Oceania. Never had I heard the footsteps so close, nor had I wanted to. I regained my feet as the first one charged into the bathroom wielding a shock baton. His swing was wide, and I blocked it as I jetted my elbow into his jaw. I felt the bone shatter, but his cry covered the sharp crack. Swinging his limp body against the toilet, I looked to the door, ready for my second attack. None came, so I grabbed the closest weapon I could find. Those puny shock sticks aren't even lethal, and I intended to kill, so I grabbed the porcelain lid of the shattered toilet and stepped out.

There I saw Tyler, his face red with rage. Three Reds were pulling him off of a fourth. They finally succeeded, and Tyler's knife and the fourth Red simultaneously dropped to the ground with a wet thud. I had moved across the floor and was now swinging my "Big Brother Standard" branded weapon into the skull of the Red on Tyler's left arm. The impact must have killed him. Feeling his arm released, Tyler swung his fist into the Red holding his other arm. As the soldier I had struck fell, I held his Colt 1911 .45 calibre pistol in place as his belt-mounted holster slipped out from under it, and levelled the forty-five at the last standing Red. His H&K UMP .45's barrel was levelled at me, but my finger was faster. The parabellum hollow-point bullet did little to the Red's bullet proof vest but stun him long enough for me to put a second round through his facemask. The exit wound left a thick red spray on the wall behind him and he collapsed in a heap.

The Red that Tyler had punched suddenly pulled him to the ground and was tying up with him in a frenzy of punches. Tyler fell to the bottom and the soldier sat over him, drawing his own pistol. Tyler looked to the left and caught the knife in the air that I had thrown to him. Slashing it across the soldier's hand, Tyler rolled the soldier off of him. Climbing on top, Tyler punched him once, and then stabbed him several times, way more than enough to kill him. He stood, covered in the fallen's blood.

"I'll get the bags and clothes," Tyler said casually, returning to the task at hand as if nothing had happened.

"I'll grab the guns and food. Grab our money and all our documents. Destroy the computer. We're out in 15." Tyler left the room, and I began picking Big Brother-issued weapons off of our foes.

"Back...up," A shallow voice whispered behind me. I turned and fired without hesitation. The red soldier dropped his radio and clasped his hands on his throat as he viciously rolled around in the pieces of the shattered porcelain. I stood over the dying man, paused, and then put one last merciful round through his mask.

"Tyler, short time!" I yelled into the loft, "we've got Reds on the way." He tossed the car keys and several bottles of Victory Gin down from the loft. I caught the keys and let the bottles smash on the floor. I returned to grabbing the weapons and ammunition from the bodies. I stripped the intact Kevlar vests off of the two enemies with head wounds. As I pulled one of the heavy vests over my shoulders, Tyler came clunking down the stairs with an armful of clothes and the documents we had stolen over the years from Big Brother.

"Tyler, leave it all," I yelled. "We need to be mobile."

With a grudging look, Tyler dropped the clothes and papers. A single sock tumbled down the stairs and settled at my feet. Grabbing a bottle of Victory Gin, I slipped the sock over the tip. As Tyler ran past me and out the door, he leaned over with his lighter and set the sock ablaze. With a throw and a turn, the bottle went sailing into the loft and I slammed the door shut behind me.

As we bolted down the hallway, Tyler shot out the window we were rapidly approaching. He then smashed and opened the glass case on the wall containing an emergency fire hose. I asked him what he was doing. Tying the hose around his waist, he replied, "Haven't you ever seen Die Hard?" He threw himself out the window and pulled me out after him. We stopped a good 15 feet short of the ground.

"Way to go, McClane. What now?"

"Let go." He stared expectantly at me. With a curse, I let my grasp go and fell to the dirt.

"Okay!" Tyler yelled. "Now catch me!"

"God, that's why you made me jump," I retorted. "Fine, jump, I've got you!" He untied the knot on the hose and dropped hard into the dirt at my feet.

"Missed," I said unapologetically, "now let's go." We moved to the garage and jumped into Tyler's car. I inserted the key and the engine quickly spun into action. White-knuckled on the steering wheel, I reached down to the gearshift, giving it a sharp jerk toward "Drive". The stick merely clicked in place.

"What the he--?" I started to say, but my lament was ceased mid-curse by a mechanical whirring inside the dashboard. The breathalyzer machine popped up before we could start it.

"Damnit, Tyler!" I scolded between my breaths into it, "Why'd you have to get that DUI? You're lucky I don't drink!" A green silhouette of an unusually sober man lit up in the dash. My hand slammed the gearshift once again. The car started and the tires squealed as I spun it into the street. Slamming it into gear, I floored it, knowing exactly where we were going. Unfortunately, Big Brother's army must have known, too. As we swerved around a corner, I slammed the brakes as our headlights lit up Big Brother-made T-94 tank in front of us, and we were close enough to look down its cannon barrel. A stunned silence and cold sweat froze time as my heart beat into my throat.

"Bone out!" shouted Tyler, pulling me back into reality as we both grabbed our guns and dove out the doors. The tank fired, demolishing the car as we narrowly escaped. I ran for cover in a bank on the West side of the street. Tyler disappeared into a butcher shop on the East side. Once through the entrance, I fired several rounds in the air to clear the room. One guard reached for his service revolver, but I pointed at him and ordered him to leave. He intelligently dropped his gun and ran for the door. I chose to let him live, since he is a civilian, but the Red's coming in after me were taken by surprise and dropped him with a hail of gunfire.

I took cover behind a teller's desk, and returned fire at the door, cutting down the Reds as they came in. Unfortunately, my ammunition depleted as quickly as my enemy fell. Switching to my Colt .45, I again returned fire. My Colt only held 7 rounds in its magazine, so many Reds were able to get inside. A soldier wielding a shotgun and I exchanged one shot each. My vest absorbed the blast, only knocking me to the floor, but his sternum was not so lucky. I fell, and as I stood, took several more hits from automatic gunfire. Reds began jumping over the desktop and I shot them one at a time, as quickly as I could, but my ammunition emptied and I was forced to engage them in close-quarters battle. The next one over the counter, I pulled to the ground and began pistol whipping. Others followed and brought me down with their shock sticks before I could beat my victim to death. I hit him hard enough, though, that he'll either remember it forever or completely forget it along with the rest of his memory. This being my last conscious thought, I went out with a smile on my face.

So now I sit here, under and interrogation light in front of you. This dark interrogation room, Room 101, constructed specifically to tap into and exploit my fears, because at some point Big Brother derived that I have a fear of the dark. You're pretty confident that I'm going to expose some sort of important information. But I won't. I don't love Big Brother. I never will. I will continue to spend my life resisting his every move. Other than that, I really don't know what to tell you. I don't know what happened to our faction. I don't know who the mole is. I don't know what happened to Tyler. I do know that he lived, though. How do I know? I know because he crawled through the vents of this building quietly, and located me. Well, I guess I do have important information, because he has a butcher's knife, and he is right behind you.

Author's Note: Suspend your disbelief when reading this. I know Die Hard (made in 1988) and Heckler & Koch didn't exist in the book, but they were added for detail and homage. Hopefully you enjoyed this story.

[Nephilim]

even since this was posted, ive made some minor edits. i havent caught everything by any stretch, but its started the process.

Hey i liked 1984 a lot. This doesn't really follow 1984 at all. That story was different because everyone was oppressed. No one fought the way your characters did. Think about this next time you choose to ruin a good story with a terrible follow up. Consider retiring?

[Nephilim]

Originally Posted by Winston

Hey i liked 1984 a lot. This doesn't really follow 1984 at all. That story was different because everyone was oppressed. No one fought the way your characters did. Think about this next time you choose to ruin a good story with a terrible follow up. Consider retiring?

Hey i like 1984 also. i also didnt like how the oppressive government won in the end. i wanted to change that in the best way i know how. so my characters are unique. they are sarcastic and violent. plus, this is exactly what this section is for - creating stories based on already-established ones. think about this next time you choose to ruin a good story with a terrible review. Consider suicide?

[Nephilim]

not catching? damn

[brutusshh]

Quite an argument you have here Nephilim.

hard liquor

This would be Victory Gin
I loved this part

"Fine, jump, I've got you!" He untied the knot on the hose and dropped hard into the dirt at my feet.

"Missed," I said unapologetically, "now let's go."

It has a humor 1984 didn't have.
My absolute favorite scene in the whole book is the one in the interrogation room (101). The part where Winston tries to place Julia between himself and the rats is so well written that there is no comparing it to anything else. I'm sorry you didn't choose to present some form of interrogation.
I do have one suggestion to make to that end. This would also satisfy Winston(the user): what if Tyler were to betray you character right in the end and chop his hand off or something similar? This way the system prevails and Big Brother lives on undisturbed.

[Nephilim]

good call on the hard liquor. it has been changed to Victory Gin. i had it as Wild Turkey before as a sort of ode to the Punisher, but this makes more sense and holds more detail from the book. also, i revised the interrogation scene at the end to match a little more with what 1984 may have done. its not perfect, but its a change for the better.

really, i dont like winston (the character or the user). The character because he speaks of lofty ideas, but backs down at the first sign of torture. the user, because he made no constructive criticism, just insult. he failed to realize the point of this section, to add ones own touches to a story. plus he was just a dick. "Consider retiring?" seriously, you need to kill yourself.

anyway in a roundabout point, i really didnt want the traditional ending, because that is what i disliked most about the book. they become as submissive as everyone else. i didnt want Big Brother to win this one. granted i didnt want him dismantled, but this would at least allow I and Tyler to escape. i enjoy discussing my stories, and honestly you are the best, most loyal review ive met yet. i look forward to discussing these topics further and reading your stories when they come along.

all the best,
Neph

[Vincentii]

I'm going to be honest here:
As a stand-alone story, this is okay: it's gritty, it's dark and violent. I did not, however, like the ending: "because he has a butcher's knife, and he is right behind you". What? Why is he behind me? Who am I supposed to be? The interrogator? The Reader? It doesn't make much sense, I feel as if it tries to be cool, but it fails miserably and feels more like a cliche of sorts.

As a story that is supposed to take place in Orwell's world, I did not like this story at all. 1984's world did not allow for rebellion, it was simply impossible to form small groups. In short, everything about this story seems wrong from a 1984 point of view. You correctly say that this section exists in order to 'add ones own touches' to a story, but you did not add your own touches to 1984. Instead, you took some of the terms and ideas created in 1984 and throw the rest out of the window. To me, this read like an manga-approach to 1984: it reads as if someone in Japan was given a short synopsis of 1984 and decided to create his own story based on this synopsis; the end result bears some similarities to the original, but the rest is foreign and incompatible with the original premise.

[katofmystery]

OMG i LUVED your story. . . it was absolutely thrilling. . . you had me hooked from the first paragraph and and never let me go. . . true though that it really follow 1984 you worked it all to your advantage!!! i have read the book 3 times now and i think that you did an absolutely fantastic job!!!!!

oh yea vincentii. . .

Originally Posted by Vincentii

I did not, however, like the ending: "because he has a butcher's knife, and he is right behind you". What? Why is he behind me? Who am I supposed to be? The interrogator? The Reader? It doesn't make much sense

i am pretty sure that he is referring to you as the interragator AND reader. . . it was pretty cool if you look back at the story and really think about it. . . i mean. . . Nephilim brought us (the reader) into the story. . . and that not very easy to do. . . Nephilim you did an amazing job and i think i'll be reading a lot more of your work especially after this amazing work. . . i can't give you another else other than a TWO THUMBS UP!!!!

luv from an admirerer
Kat

[Wesley]

I would love to see more time and refinement into this story. 1984 was a terrific story. The idea of an underground revolution however, would take some time to explain. Perhaps this all started from some of the higher ups?

I chuckled when the gin smashed on the floor showing that Tyler has no idea what is "essential" maybe this should come into play on more serious terms later?

Also, for realism's sake, a shotgun blast at the "implied range" would still kill you. I'm worried that the character is a bit too super-human.

I say this is a good start.

[AnimeFreakGeek]

There are some good basis here for a story- but its such a far reach from 1984 that i dont know if it can really be called fan fiction. That is not to say it is not well written, you have action, drama, descriotion and that is all good. There is plenty of room for more development and depth to this story, so keep up the work! ^_^

[Wesley]

I just reread this and I still like it.