[superbum]

INDEX

Scene 1 & 2 <- You are here.
Scene 3
Scene 4 & 5
Scene 6 & 7
Scene 8, 9, & Credits

This is the story of how Satin acquires horns, for a little while, and how Super Bum's death is delayed, for a little while.

Scene 1


INT. APT LIVINGROOM - LATE MORNING


There is a second hand couch sitting in the middle of the living room, to the left of that sits an empty uncoordinated chair and behind the couch on the wall to left is the apartment’s door. The wall behind the couch ends to the right of the couch with an open entranceway that you can see a few kitchen appliances through. to the right of the entrance way is a hallway that leads further to the right where there are two bedrooms and a bathroom.

SUPER BUM sits on the couch eating a bowl of cereal, intently watching TV. He wears a black Zorro style mask and has S dot B written on his t-shirt with electrical tape so that it can almost be mistaken as SOB.

FUDY (a dog) sits on the floor next to him also watching the TV.

The tv is heard in the background through out the scene.

SATIN a red skinned half goat man with two large moles where you would expect to see horns enters scene from right, eyes barely open and dragging his feet.

SUPER BUM
(faking cheer)
Good morning sunshine.
(normal tone)
You left a drunken note on the fridge for your self.

SATIN
(unintelligable mumble)

Satin stumbles into the kitchen and heads towards the fridge.

SATIN (V.O.)
Dear Satin, You met a Goth chic last night and joined her cult. You can see her again at the cult meeting today at 1:00 PM. Your cult-issued t-shirt is in your drawer, don’t be late! hugs and kisses Satin. P.S. Don’t wear your H.I.M. shirt, bitch ranted about them being posers for hours. P.P.S. Strong jaw muscles, maybe she gives good head.

TV(V.O.)
Earlier today Angelia Jolie sat on a bench and looked hot,

Satin walks back into living room with a bowl of cereal

TV (CONT’D)
Angelina’s spokesperson spoke on her behalf, saying, “She just likes being the reason losers get off...”

SATIN
God, I’d love to get in her pants.

SUPER BUM
There isn’t much I wouldn’t do to get with her.

FUDY
There isn’t much I wouldn’t do to get my balls back.

SATIN
(obviously avoiding the situation)
Well I’d better get going.

Satin puts the bowl of cereal on the ground at his feet, Fudy walks over and begins eating it.

SUPER BUM
(whining a little)
How many times do I have to tell you: Bob Barker told me to!

Satin exits scene to the right.

FUDY
(mocking Super Bum)
Ewwww, “Bob Barker told me too.”

SUPER BUM
And the vet too, they said you’d live longer and be happier.

FUDY
(Anger is evident in his voice for the first time)
I suppose if they had said that about your balls you’d chop them off right then and there! Do I look happier to you?

SUPER BUM
Look man that was before you could talk and were all smart and shit...

FUDY
Don’t call me “man”

Satin enters from right wearing his H.I.M. shirt.

FUDY (CONT’D)
I’m a fucking dog don’t lump me in... Hey Satin isn’t it your H.I.M. shirt?

SATIN
(out loud to himself)
Shit.

SUPER BUM
Didn’t you write that note?

FUDY
Yeah, what the hell, I know you’re from Adams, home of the sister-wife, but you fricking wrote it.

SATIN
Leave me alone, I’m hung over as shit.

FUDY
And apparently illiterate.

Satin exits back to right.

SUPER BUM
That’s good, couldn’t read his own note!

Awkward silence

FUDY
You suck.

SUPER BUM
Get over it.

Awkward silence.

Satin enters from right.

SATIN
Good bye and fuck you guys, I’m gettin’ some!

FUDY
Hope she likes Goat balls.

Satin leaves apartment through door.



Scene 2

INT. APT LIVINGROOM - AFTERNOON


SUPER BUM still sitting on couch same outfit, bowl of cereal replaced by canned beverage.

FUDY is still laying next to him.

SATIN enters from left with horns where his moles used to be.

SUPER BUM
So how'd she like your goat balls?

FUDY
It’s pretty lame to glue horns to your head even if you are half goat.

SATIN
I didn’t glue anything, these babies are real.

Super Bum stands up and yanks on a horn.

SUPER BUM
Hey, shit, these are really stuck on.

SATIN
Don’t pull on ‘em or I’ll jab your eye out!

FUDY
Where’d you get those?

SATIN
I grew ‘em.

FUDY
In two hours?

SATIN
I told you they were ready to pop through at anytime.

SUPER BUM
You’ve been saying that for ten years!

SATIN
Yeah and I was right so fuck off. I’ve got to get this pentagram off my chest, it’s supposed to be warm all the time but it burns my sunburn.

Satin exits to right

[Lubesh]

H ha I hear ya....hope theres plenty more to come. I began to have niggles re content but your stuff doesnt need it...and i am assuming there wil be, but not much point to it i hopelol.

[superbum]

I would never have a point, it's so pointless.

[Peppy]

Well, from the last entries I read, which was a year ago, I have to say you improved your writing. Your random humour seems to be more balanced in this piece - Bob Barker, Angelina(this joke is hilarious and true), H.I.M., all seemed to make a their own kick.Satin, Super Bum, and Fudy seem strange and weird, especially Super Bum. Hmmmmmmm...

I think playwrights or screenplays are a better suit for you. If you practiced, you'll be an expert in no time. Story-writing is another matter.

I think you missed a few commas and word to make this flow right, but I'm not sure what the rules are in making a platwrite or screenplay. Not sure at all.

Anywho, I liked reading this. I like dialogue and how people react to it. Good read.

SUPER BUM still sitting on couch same outfit, bowl of cereal repla(c)ed by canned beverage.

It’s pretty lame to glue horns to your head even if you are (a) half goat.