[DarkPhoenix]

Synopsis: A stolen gem. A kingdom on the brink of ruin. Four united by the bond of death. The White tower has called Destiny to take place... The is RIPPLED SHADOW...


CHAPTER ONE

He ran, ducking and weaving, trying to get through the crowd without being spotted. They had been pursuing him for longer than he had expected. Normally they would have given up as soon as he made a dash for the inner city market place. Drazic jumped up onto the roof of one of the vendor’s carts and made a quick glance behind him. They were still hot on his trail.

"Stop him!" yelled one of the guards.

None of the citizens aided the guards, as they froze in a brief moment of fear, unsure of what to do. Drazic made the jump from the roof of the vendor’s cart to a rooftop. He ran along, jumping from one rooftop to the next, hoping this would allow him to lose the guards. From this height he was able to catch a glimpse of the city as it sprawled out all around from where he was running. Small houses with flat rooves, made from limestone and clay. The streets and alleys were not paved in this city like he had heard it was in other much larger and grander cities near the Royal City, but they were bare with nothing to comfort bare feet from the hot sand. He had grown to accept the heat from this city long ago, even though the memories of his past made him believe he came from a town near the mountains, where he knew it was cooler and much nicer.

He tripped as he landed on one of the larger houses and scraped his knee. He let out a small cry of agony as he jumped back to his feet and hid behind a large barrel near the edge of the roof. He could hear the guards below on the street discussing strategies to find him or to draw him out.

He wiped the sweat from his forehead, and brushed his blonde fringe away from his face, peering over the edge just enough so his deep blue eyes could watch the guards without being seen. They still stood huddled in conversation, intent on catching him.

Drazic looked at the small linen bag he had stolen from the man in the street to see why they pursued him so relentlessly. His mouth dropped open in shock as he realised it was not gold he had stolen but a gem. It was a small ruby almost the size of a pebble. Its red colour spread all over the palm of his hand as the warm desert sun shone down on it.

He realised now just how valuable this gem was, it was the reason the town had suddenly had extra guards come to protect Lord Arak who was travelling to the Royal City to pay tribute to the new king. All the rogues in the city had wanted to steal this gem, but he actually had and by sheer chance.

Drazic had been sneaking through the outer market place looking for the main vendor who had developed the best and tastiest recipe for bread within the city. Drazic had taken to stealing his morning meal before heading off to training at the local headquarters for his particular rogue guild.

He had seen a man walking a few feet ahead of a guard who was clearly following him, keeping watch for those who came too close. Drazic saw the pouch dangling from the man’s waist sash. He knew anyone who had a guard for protection must be wealthy. But he had no idea this man was Lord Arak and that he carried the precious ruby on his person.

He had dashed along the crowd, moving with the shadows, keeping cool so he wouldn’t sweat and lose grip on the bag as he clutched it. He had become quite a skilled rogue since his teachings began, and had begun to earn himself quite a reputation around the city within other rogue guilds. Each had extended an invitation for him to join them to become superior in the skill of thievery.

As he clutched the bag and pulled it away with his swift fingers, than man had noticed nothing. Moments had passed before he heard the man yell his pouch had been stolen. Despite his calm nature Drazic began to run, not afraid of being caught, but afraid his brethren may be around watching his flawed performance. So he fled the scene and the guard called for more and the chase had begun.

Now he sat listening to the guards' conversation below and staring deep into the ruby, as though mesmerised.

"Get to the roof and find him!" The sudden sound of a new voice below drew his attention to the men below. He saw Lord Arak standing in the middle of the guards now; they had formed a circle around him. "That ruby is to be presented to the new king on tomorrow’s moon."

The guards did not move. It was as though they feared the wrong answer or movement might bring them to be punished.

"If that ruby is not found by tonight," Lord Arak said, "I will ensure Lord Darmidar will pay this town a visit and reconsider his future contributions to this city."

Lord Arak turned and walked away heading back toward the grander part of the city where the gardens lay. Drazic knew he had been staying there; it had been in all the morning scrolls throughout the city. If news of the stolen ruby spread, he knew the price from the streets would soar. Every collector of Noble items would pay hundreds of gold coins for this gem. But he would not get that kind of money from this city. He knew he now must travel away from here and get to Royal City to try to sell his wares there.

The guards had spread out to surround the building he had crouched on. He knew there was no way he could turn back now and run the way he had come; they would be watching for that. No other building was close enough for him to jump across to and run to safety.

"Hey!" he heard a voice say from the roof of the armoury. A man and woman sat on the edge of it ducking down behind the raised edge so as not to be seen from the ground. They threw over a roped ladder made of spindlewire, a substance that the sun's rays seemed to make almost invisible.

When he had reached his twelfth winter, his guild had placed a small crystallized substance on the outer layer of his eye as a prize for escaping one of the rogue tests for his age groups that enabled him to see spindlewire with ease and clarity.

He took another look down below at the guards who were searching barrels on the ground in case he decided to hide in one. He looked at the barrels he had crouched behind and an idea struck him. While the spindlewire would protect him from sight from anyone directly below him, if they were on an angle or at eye level he would be seen clearly.

After placing the ruby safely back in its pouch, he grabbed the barrel and found it was much lighter than he had expected and threw it off the far side of the building, which, as he had expected, drew the attention of all the guards. He grabbed onto the spindlewire and began to climb across, all the while staring at the man and woman at the other end waiting for them to release their end so he would drop to the ground where the guards could get him. But they did not let go. As he neared the end where they sat, still crouched from view, he reached back into his boot and drew his dagger out. He had a thought that they may have seen the ruby and want to kill him and take it for their own profit and he would not let that happen.

They saw the dagger and moved a few feet back into the centre of the building but still retained their grip on the rope.

Drazic was very agile and immediately sprang to his feet as soon as he reached the safety of the rooftop. He looked at the man and woman as they quickly pulled the spindlewire and rolled it up and placed it inside the man’s instrument bag.

"Why did you aid me?" Drazic asked crouching down behind the raised side of the wall but keeping his distance from the man and woman. "I have no intention of reward."

"Sometimes providing a second chance for someone to have a future is reward enough," the woman said in a cool, melodic voice. Just the sound seemed to calm Drazic’s rapid heart beat.

"We did not ask for any reward," the man said smiling at him. "Our actions were our own free of greed."

Drazic had only half listened as he had been eyeing the rooftop the for quickest escape routes.

"Many thanks," He has said not very sincerely and took off for the far side of the building.

He jumped down landing on the cushion vendor’s products and continued to run, not because he was being chased, but because he was swift and did not care for slow paced walking through the outer limits of the city he was nearing. He wanted to get back to his hiding place as fast as possible before anyone recognised or saw him and began following him.

He rounded the buildings and dropped into a unused drain that led to an underground lair. Deep within the lair was an area he had found at a very young age, where the bricks were loose and behind was an area lit nicely during the day as there were shards of glass around the top of the walls, which reflected the sun's rays during the day, and the moons glow at night.

Drazic had decorated the place with his own conquests. Cushions he had stolen, rugs he had taken, and trophies from his targets he did not sell for gold. It felt safe for him here, even when he had to hide for days with no food when the guards began cracking down on crime, usually before visits from the Lords of the Royal City came to collect the taxes. He had tried storing food down here when he first had called this home but after one night the bread would become green and make him sick if he ate it. He had learned a lot abouttaking care of himself from an early age, and his guild had taught him all he had come to learn of the ways of the cities. The place where gold was stored was the hardest to steal from, but gained a lot of reputation within the guild.

Reputation, Drazic was often told by the guild leader of the city, is all that matters to a rogue. It means someone will find him and hire him for gold to steal things from those they hate, despise or envy. Greed was a rogue’s best friend as it is what drives clients his way.

"That is no trinket you carry."

The sudden noise did not startle Drazic as he turned to face the speaker.

The pale face and transparent body stood there, the robes draping from the bony arms were moving from left to right as though blowing in the wind, yet there was no breeze in Drazic’s hideout.

"I do not seek council from you, old man." Drazic said collapsing onto a soft, woolen cushion he had taken from one of the vendors months ago. "I seek rest."

"Sometimes what we seek is not what is needed," The old man floated from his side of the room and came to a halt next to the place where Drazic lay. "Nor is it what we always get."

Drazic tries to suppress a smile at the old man’s comments.

"You are but a spirit of this world," Drazic said. "What knowledge have you got of what is needed? Or wanted, you have no desires. You know nothing of why you come to me, or why it is that you cannot leave this world."

The spirit sat next to Drazic on the floor.

"My friend," he said. "The time has come for you to leave this city, for the jewel you carry will not be forgotten and the Lord Arak will look for it, for his master will punish him for losing it."

"I have already planned to leave," Drazic said, sitting upright and looking into the old man’s pale face. "I am heading to Royal City to sell this for gold before I return here and complete my final rogue training and ascend the ranks within my guild."

Without waiting for a reply Drazic got to his feet, having become uncomfortable from the spirit's presence, and went to gather his things.

He had stolen a small linen bag very early on, a good and sturdy one capable of carrying many items on a long journey without fraying like the more common bags other vendors sold. He reached to a hole in the wall where he kept extra boots and clothes and put them inside.

"It will take me four days to get to Royal City if I steal a ride in a travelling caravan. I shall be back within ten days," Drazic said, moving to exit the hidden safe house. "I know you cannot follow me outside this room, but I will be back in ten days, carrying loads of gold."

The spirit moved to the doorway and watched as Drazic began to stealthily leave the hiding place and embark on his journey.

"Your journey is begun, Drazic," The spirit whispered to itself. "You will not return here, but I will see you again."

This concludes chapter 1 of RIPPLED SHADOW... more to come

[beverent]

Wow.. I Like the story's plot. And you started with lot of actions so I'm expecting a pretty good chapter following this one. You have described everything well, it's as if viewing the whole thing while I read it.
Some corrections though that I would want to suggest,

"Your journey is begun..."

I think that should be

"Your journey has begun..."

Well its an obvious mistake I bet you just forgot to change it.

[katofmystery]

Wow. . . Nice plot! I like your story. . . Do you already have the second part?? LOL It's really good! I'll be looking out for the next parts to come. . .

[RENA HANDS]

What did the guard call for? More reinforcements?

Shouldn’t ‘king,’ be capitalized?

I would switch more with ‘gem,’ ruby, possibly ‘crimson stone.’

Possibly…He knew (now that) he must travel…

Is this a possessive…for escaping one of the rouge tests (rouge’s tests)?

Another possible possessive…and the moons (moon’s) glow at night. ?

Spacing…abouttaking (about taking)…

So this is something like Dungeon and Dragons? I’ll give 3/5 for the clear imagery and easy action.

[Randomgold]

A good start this is. You do make a few simple errors is things like spelling and grammar, but other than that, there's no problems I can see. I hope you continue with this story.

[DarkPhoenix]

Hi I am the author of RIPPLED SHADOW, i would like to thank everyone for their emails and support, and would also like to announce it is getting published. So if you would like a copy please email me at m_j_ogden@hotmail.com please put RIPPLED SHADOW copy in the subject line so I will know and i can email you with details and more.


Michael

[RENA HANDS]

Well, allow me to be the first publicly post…Congratulations! You’re going to be published!

[Lubesh]

Congratualtions....much luck to you.

[katofmystery]

Woo-hoo! Congrats!

[Alex]

This was a really good story. I've always enjoyed reading stories about theives, based in the middle ages. I am looking forward to reading the next chapter. Though, the only slight complaint i have is the spirit, i dont like the way you introduced it. You could have explained what it was and how the main character came to know it. Good story though.

[cheung shun sang]

Vey attractive stories . a sorof shorten long tales . very enjoyable

[timtornado3721]

He had learned a lot abouttaking care of himself from an early age,

Seperate these two words.

A good start. I especially like the end. The spirit's last couple of sentences were very suspenseful. However, it would be good to know why he's there in the safe house.

One thing that gets me is the man and woman with the spindlewire. What purpose do they serve in this? Why would they save him for nothing or even care about his future? Plus, how would they have spindlewire if they aren't part of the guild?