[Vince]

I will wake up one sunny morning,
I'll get out and see no man.
They will have all left, noone around;
A deserted land,
With deserted houses and deserted hearts.
An alarm clock is still ringing;
Nobody to turn it off.
The roads empty, no car to cross.
It's the end of the world,
People got in huge winged cages;
They flew high, to get away.
Those who stayed back, murdered.
It's the end of the world,
And I'm by myself, all alone.
How could I miss it?
The TV said it.
- I had turned it off -
The radio said it.
- I had broken the radio -
The president said it.
- I didn't vote for him -
And I got stuck here.
I will wear my fanciest clothes,
I'll climb the tallest hill,
And I'll watch the last sunset.
I will remember a fairy tale,
Far away, people will see me.
They'll believe they're still alive.
It's the end of the world,
And I'm by myself, living happily with myself.

Author's note: Main idea taken from a greek song.

[RENA HANDS]

Intriguing.

But what about…

I will wake one sunny morning,
I shall seek out another man, but find none.
They’ve departed, absence all around;
A deserted land
With abandoned homes and forsaken hearts.

An alarm clock still rings; (originally…clock is still ringing what tense are you using?

Nobody to turn it off.
Roads are empty, cars have not been crossed.
It’s the end.(Consider just a simple “end.”)
Man forced in winged cages;
They flew high to escape.
Those who remained, murdered.
It’s the end,
And I am all alone.
How was it missed?
The announcer screamed it.
The TV was turned off
The radio blared it
So I smashed it.

The President cried. (President should be capitalized).

I didn’t vote for him.
Now I am trapped(remain) here.
I wear my fancies garments,
I’ll scale the tallest hill,
And I’ll watch the last sunset.
I remember fairy tales.
At great distance people see me.
Hope, they still believe.
It’s the end,
I am not alone.

This was merely a play of your words and mean no insult by switching, tweaking a dramatic image.

[Vince]

Bravo! You did very good lol. I'm not insulted at all. All I did was try to tell a story. And you did that with more images. I have to disagree on two parts though.

1st - The TV, radio and president bit. I wanted to make it sound all in one sentence, without a breath. That's why it has to keep it simple and somewhat repeated.

2nd The closing lines. People do not hope they will live. They believe they will survive. Also he's indeed alone, but he is happy with that.

Other than that you covered my work the way Johny Cash covereed Nine Inch Nails' Hurt. You made it better

[Gurdit]

I liked it as it is, I think.
I found a certain charm in it that puts me in a strange mood. It's as if I almost want to be the person in your poem. Alone and happy. Right now, I'm just alone (in my very weird way).

You changed your tense from future to present (continuous), but I think it works. In the first four lines, you are predicting what's going to happen, and in the lines that follow, you are describing your prediction in the present continuous, as if you are really walking in that thought at that exact time, describing it as if you're looking at it for the first time, right now. And then again you turn to your future tense talking about your intentions.

Thinking of it metaphorically is even more beautiful.
I see how everyone wants someone to tell them what to do. So they watch TV, listen to the radio, and obey the president. And what happens then? They all leave, go far away, to a place you don't want to go.
And you're left alone... happy
Bliss.

Nice one, Ketchup.

[Lubesh]

gosh, apart from the technical which has been handled.. some thougts in there were amazing..fromthe tv switched off to u dint vote and people wtching ..dea dpeople and ur there....very good vince and stop thinking lol