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  #31 (permalink)  
Old 24-08-2008, 10:14 AM
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Re: Two O’Clock In A Coffee Shop (a cowrite by vorcla and dearest)

Tay - whoa, sorry man! I always try to reply to everyone who comments , and I missed you. I apologize for that. I'm really glad you liked it. I appreciate it coming from you, too, because you've really been sharpening your poetic chops lately!
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  #32 (permalink)  
Old 08-11-2008, 05:03 PM
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Re: Two O’Clock In A Coffee Shop (a cowrite by vorcla and dearest)

Wow! This was amazing...to both of you! I'm curious to ask who wrote which part? One part seems definitely female and one seems definitely male..(but I might just be leaning on classic stereotypes there...) I loved how each stanza from both voices connected with the one before it and the one after it! Your words are so grasping and perfectly selected that I can feel the ache in this poem! I love how it doesn't rhyme and isn't perfect and is just so..right for the topic at hand!

I have nothing to correct or critique about this poem! It is amazing...that is all that I can say!
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  #33 (permalink)  
Old 08-11-2008, 09:49 PM
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Re: Two O’Clock In A Coffee Shop (a cowrite by vorcla and dearest)

Whoa - thanks, Kit. Yeas - Tricia and I wanted to make it fairly easy for the reader to be able to delineate between the male and female voices. Glad you enjoyed; thanks for reading.
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Old 09-11-2008, 01:29 AM
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Re: Two O’Clock In A Coffee Shop (a cowrite by vorcla and dearest)

Ah, it's so difficult to decide whether or not I liked this one or the other cowrite.

There's not much I can say, except that I loved it, it was emotional, and it was brilliant.

I can't tell who's what stanza, but I loved:

Quote:
Love letters blinked in morse
Extravagantly Wonderful. Just that line was--huh, can't think of any other adjectives, lol--awesome.

Quote:

So I stuck myself in neutral
As the cars went passing by
Sitting, wishing, on an overpass
Stuck in memories
And hearing your favorite song
On the midnight radio
The imagery, metaphor, and everything about that stanza was perfect. Loved it. I am crying (not quite, but I feel like it).

I especially enjoyed the final stanza.

Ah-ha!! I have it! It's the Dramatic Irony of the poem that I love! It's how the two characters still have feelings for each other, but they have no clue that the other does!!

Wow, I must sound like an idiot pointing out these things, but I just loved them.

I think I am going to thank you both for letting me read it. That's how good it was.
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  #35 (permalink)  
Old 09-11-2008, 12:28 PM
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Re: Two O’Clock In A Coffee Shop (a cowrite by vorcla and dearest)

No problem-o my friend! I'm still curious as to who wrote which parts though. Did you both work on the entirety of thie piece or did one of you write the male part and one the female? If so, who wrote the male and who wrote the female??
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  #36 (permalink)  
Old 09-11-2008, 01:11 PM
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Re: Two O’Clock In A Coffee Shop (a cowrite by vorcla and dearest)

As you would expect, Tricia wrote the "girl" section and I wrote the "guy" section. We co-write on MSN; first we brainstorm about what we want to say, then one of us will write a part, and the other will then respond. It works pretty well.

Tricia wrote the finisher, that incredible last stanza, by herself.
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Old 10-11-2008, 08:09 AM
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Re: Two O’Clock In A Coffee Shop (a cowrite by vorcla and dearest)

Whoa, I've been shirking my responding duties! Sorry about that.

Thanks very much Kit and Zoidberg! Well, I think Rick pretty much answered your questions. I wrote the girl stanzas, he wrote the guy. To anyone that hasn't ever cowritten anything, I would definitely recommend it. I haven't had that much fun writing a poem for a long time. ^_^ Bouncing ideas off of each other and just writing on the fly was blast. I'm so glad you both enjoyed reading this (i know I enjoyed writing it ^_^)
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