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Re: Bliss
This one appeals to me... I've always had this tension in me between appreciating the natural state of things - wild, overgrown, thorny, yet untamed - and feeling the need for order which is in direct opposition to that. Must we bend all of nature to our whims, to make it controlled, convenient, and safe?
Wondeful imagery and thought crammed into a little space. Ok, my reponse was longer than your poem.
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"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams." ~ Arthur William Edgar O'Shaughnessy "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid." ~ Basil King |
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Re: Bliss
I fear my head is in the gutter and I took this one completely out of context. All the same, clever little one and well done, with some great images in so few words.
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"when one person suffers from a delusion it is called insanity. When many people suffer from a delusion it is called religion."
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Re: Bliss
Context? Now I'm re-reading... lol
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"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams." ~ Arthur William Edgar O'Shaughnessy "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid." ~ Basil King |
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Re: Bliss
It was the whole shaven and unshaven 'lawn' and garden bit that had me instantly thinking female anatomy rather than nature
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"when one person suffers from a delusion it is called insanity. When many people suffer from a delusion it is called religion."
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Re: Bliss
Quote:
Venomous how could you?..... Colin |
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Re: Bliss
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Bluejay thank you very much..... Colin |
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Re: Bliss
Minor caveat: I'd take out the "I" in the third line. I think it's implicit and, to me, it sounds better without it.
But I loved it. It's interesting how thought provoking a short bit of poetry like that can be. Are you sure you don't want to enter the 55?
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"Your spirit I can't see/but I still believe/I can feel your breath on me" |
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Dramatics and great imagery too! It definitely plays on the reader's mind. I rate 5/5!
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Right, I'll keep to the present but just take a glance at the past. Damn, is this poetry?
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Re: Bliss
Thanks 'Smokey' and 'Rena'. Given this is a parody of course, much of the credit (as with all of my parodies) must go to the original author, in this case 'Mr. Walrond'. Indeed, for this particular piece, I merely changed the final line in my efforts to achieve the desired effect.
Colin
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Colin Baker. |
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Re: Bliss
colin, no offence, and there's the possibility that I'm just stupid, but i can't understand this. i might be trying to over interpret what you're saying; i don't really see any deeper meaning in this, and that might just be the point. still, i can't get around that.
anyways, it was good imagery, even if i'm too dumb to see it
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I wish ...straight on into frantic oblivion. Safety. Obscurity. Just another freak, in the freak kingdom. -Hunter S. Thompson |
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Re: Bliss
hmmm.....more itching to persuade you to 'write'....go on...for me, but i got ya and that's our colin readers!
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Re: Bliss
Quote:
Thanks Timmay...And please do interpret it as you so wish... Colin |
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