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Well, I approve these ‘trites,’ that were ‘lumped together.’
As I read the first stanza/paragraph (I think that’s not right) I thought I was reading a Haiku. What about… Scream at the wind as it sweeps down upon you, never changing its course. (Just a thought, no need to alter ur original.) what about… The rain brings clouds still the flowers grow. Were u trying to say that a storm whatever its intensity brings destruction still even the smallest/single flower flourishes? Really, really…loudly applauding the last stanza/paragraph. The darkened path needs but firm footsteps to reach once more the light. Its very philosophical and visual.
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Right, I'll keep to the present but just take a glance at the past. Damn, is this poetry?
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Re: Speak / Create / Live / Persevere
Quote:
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"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams." ~ Arthur William Edgar O'Shaughnessy "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid." ~ Basil King |
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Re: Speak / Create / Live / Persevere
I appreciated/enjoyed the balances, or peaks and troughs throughout and 'trite' ..you should get that looked at....lol
Expert writing by an aspiring expert..and poetry.
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Re: Speak / Create / Live / Persevere
whether trite or not, your poems/perspectives felt fresh to me! ... and to say the least, I think our minds work on the same things sometimes
indeed inspirational |
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