[Theboss1985]

The trees begin to whisper
As the sky begins to cry
Then you appear before me
I try not to close my eyes
'Cause the pain of crying without tears
Is something I can not subdue
'Cause I’m running out of prayers
That could bring me back to you

Now you lie alone in the bed we made
As my heart it, cries your serenade
I reach out to hold you close
And I realize, I got nothing
Where I need it most
Cause the chains around my heart
Have slowly come undone
And as I reach to pull you closer
I fade into the sun

I know you can’t hold on to nothing
And they say I can’t come back
We said it would last forever
But the future is always black
And I’ll be waiting here
To hold you one more time
And then you can show the angels how to shine

But, now you lie alone in the bed we made
As my heart it, cries your serenade
I reach out to hold you close
And I realize, I got nothing
Where I need it most
Cause the chains around my heart
Have slowly come undone
And as I reach to pull you closer
I fade into the sun

They say I made it to heaven
But its hell until your here
Cause I can’t feel my heart
Until I can pull you near

But, now you lie alone in the bed we made
As my heart it, cries your serenade
I reach out to hold you close
And I realize, I got nothing
Where I need it most
Cause the chains around my heart
Have slowly come undone
And as I reach to pull you closer
I fade into the sun

[Venomous Vixen]

As my heart it cries your serenade

add a comma before 'it'. I think it would help the flow.


Again, as soon as you become active on the boards I can get this up for you as well

[Theboss1985]

Thanks for the edit again

[Venomous Vixen]

You definitely have a knack for lyrics, any chance you have put them to music and can get a recording up on here?

[Theboss1985]

I can only hear the music in my head, haven't been able to record anything, and with my voice and music ability, u prob don't want me too lol.

Thanks for the kind words

[Nupur]

These are terrific lyrics. I agree with VV. You definitely have a knack for writing these. Just a little suggestion:

Cause the pain of crying without tears

This stands for because. It would be better to have an apostrophe before cause just to show that it's a short form.

'Cause the pain of crying without tears

Apart from the little suggestion, I love, love, love these lyrics!

[Corneac]

Wow. Impressive writing - do you write poetry too? I can't write lyrics for a grain fo salt, so anyoen who can, as well as the are written, impresses me. Your flow was flawless and I'd love to see it put to music - but it was such an effortless read that I could almost hear the melody in my head.

As my heart it, cries your serenade
I reach out to hold you close

I think she meant, befroe "it", it's a bit awry there.

But, Now you lie alone in the bed we made

Should now be capitalized?

They say I made it to heaven
But its hell until your here
Cause I can’t feel my heart
Until I can pull you near

My favourite verse, heartbreakingly simple. Bloody great job mate. I loved it.

[xtremelady]

Great flow mingled with haunting sadness. Simply beautiful...I echo all who said would love to see this put to music. As I am also non musical – understand completely. There are I have been told composers who look for lyrists to work on joint projects, so who knows because this is spectacular. I have done a bit of research into if you are interested.