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10-12-2005, 10:03 AM
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Wintertime
Wintertime
Burning, raging, orange hues A new sunset bursts into song A garnish for the winter snow Cold and ever long Winter birds leave footprints In a powder puff dream Moaning lakes crackle; Frozen mists grip Trickles, trickle From icicles over stream Halos clutching every bough Are shaken gently to the ground Frosted fields and snow peaked hills Pristine, unspoilt White light of winter For miles and miles around
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10-12-2005, 10:40 AM
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Re: Wintertime
your poem was thown to gather. It makes no sence.
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11-12-2005, 03:47 AM
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Re: Wintertime
I really love this one, lubesh.
I had been looking for a poem that suits the season, and yours fits so well, I will put it on my list to memorize.  With all the walking I have to do when there's snow on the ground (biking being out of the question) it's nice to have things to recite on the way to classes."Burning, raging orange hues".....great imagery!
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"You didn't come into this world. You came out of it, like a wave from the ocean. You are not a stranger here." ~ Alan Watts Last edited by Epsilonist; 13-12-2005 at 07:16 AM.
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11-12-2005, 04:28 AM
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Re: Wintertime
ah thanks eps......i was deflated by unregistered there....lol NOT!! mind u truth be told i did sort of throw it togeth whilst scribbling and doing bills and put it on here and then to see that sort of spooky!!!!!
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11-12-2005, 10:11 AM
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Re: Wintertime
well you know some of the best poetry is thrown together.. lol
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11-12-2005, 05:54 PM
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Re: Wintertime
Wow great imagery. Nice work.
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13-12-2005, 12:15 AM
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Re: Wintertime
Excellent work here. You really manage to portray the brilliance of winter. How lovely. I especially like the phrase
Quote:
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13-12-2005, 06:16 AM
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Re: Wintertime
thanks guys.....i love powder puff lady lol
__________________
Did you know...points are up for grabs....just for entering... 250 - LIMERICK, CFPC, 55, EMWE, 1000 - TotM, 1000 WC 100 - VOTING IN A CONTEST POLL, YES, JUST VOTING! Comp/Challenges FFFC CFPC 1000-Word Challenge Limerick ToTM EMWE GQC
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13-12-2005, 02:23 PM
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Re: Wintertime
I loved this! I loved "a garnish for the winter snow". Hey, I live in the snow, and this really impressed me.
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13-12-2005, 03:07 PM
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Re: Wintertime
Nice throw there. I really like this. For those of us that love the snow but live in the desert state know as Texas, this really makes me feel the cold. Thanks.
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27-03-2006, 09:32 AM
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Re: Wintertime
Hi Lubesh,
You know, I finally did memorize this one. It's rolling around in there with the marbles now
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"You didn't come into this world. You came out of it, like a wave from the ocean. You are not a stranger here." ~ Alan Watts
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31-03-2006, 01:40 AM
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Re: Wintertime
well don't lose it...remember the marbles fiasco!!!!!!
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Did you know...points are up for grabs....just for entering... 250 - LIMERICK, CFPC, 55, EMWE, 1000 - TotM, 1000 WC 100 - VOTING IN A CONTEST POLL, YES, JUST VOTING! Comp/Challenges FFFC CFPC 1000-Word Challenge Limerick ToTM EMWE GQC
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04-04-2006, 11:54 AM
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Re: Wintertime
I never got that... Whats with the marbles goddamnit.
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04-04-2006, 05:46 PM
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Re: Wintertime
I've never seen snow, and i was able to imagine it thought this, Thanks.
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10-04-2006, 11:05 AM
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Re: Wintertime
good work from the mr. spinx
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Not everything makes sense , except to those who have lived it
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11-04-2006, 09:33 AM
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Re: Wintertime
nice of you mr s and thanks everyone else
__________________
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11-04-2006, 12:51 PM
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Re: Wintertime
I really enjoyed this poem, especially the first line as I associate orange with rage. The only line I didn't really like was "as cold as it is long," which seemed a little juvenile and stood out among your wonderful descriptions and images. "A powder puff dream" struck me as a particularly powerful description, original and capable of unearthing a sub-conscious image of snow. I look foward to reading your other posts.
Last edited by jason; 12-04-2006 at 09:38 AM.
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12-04-2006, 09:48 AM
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Re: Wintertime
thank you jason......i agree about the cold as it is long.apart from it doesn't make sense rreally but i remmeber having trouble finding something for that.i have changed it though
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Did you know...points are up for grabs....just for entering... 250 - LIMERICK, CFPC, 55, EMWE, 1000 - TotM, 1000 WC 100 - VOTING IN A CONTEST POLL, YES, JUST VOTING! Comp/Challenges FFFC CFPC 1000-Word Challenge Limerick ToTM EMWE GQC
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14-04-2006, 12:15 PM
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Re: Wintertime
I really hated the lines:
Burning, raging, orange hues A new sunset bursts into song Because this is a poem about Winter! And the words, burning, raging and the description of orange hues to the new sunset....did not describe winter at all. The picture that it draws is that of Florida in mid summertime...not winter in a country side...as the rest of the poem and title lead you to believe.
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