[spinx]

Should I say I am
sorry for my past
experiences

Or just erase my
next existence

How can you erase
what has not been
written

Or has it already
been foreseen
by fates helper

Fairy tales and tall
tales told to babes
while resting in
rocking cradles

And summer time
blues sung to girls
in drunkin' gallon
hats dancing to
their hearts content

While somewhere in
the forest a young
girls wishes have
just been granted

And the moon has
laid the sun to rest

So wiery travelers
can rest under its
velvety milky ways

As we lay our path
guided by only the
midnight stars to
our next destinations

No amount of gold
could cover this
very sight

Of seeing life's
greatest achievements

To bury our toes in
the sand where
the very first ship
landed

And the first supper
that has just been
granted

With full bellies
all contented

To a long jurney
we will be well
rested

And so to will
a ripple in time
open with
answers to those
questions

[roan54]

i love this. i was slightly lost in some places, but when i read it again, i got more out of it. i love all your imagery. i also love the long ramble-yness of it.

[Bluejay]

This is very nice. It has a definite dreamlike quality to it. At first, the line breaks threw me; but after a few readings, they seem deliberate, as if to lead you
along without
giving you time for
breath. (whew!)
I'm assuming the lack of punctuation is for the same reason.

A few minor nits:

by fate's helper

girl's wishes have

So weary travelers

And so too will

All in all, a good job, and a joy to read!

[RENA HANDS]

The thoughts are general but simple.
The thoughts are also incomplete.
Are the punctuation errors deliberate?

[spinx]

no i don't normally put them in, it is for pauseing as i am feeling it or the way it is in thoght