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13-01-2006, 09:48 AM
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Enfer
A tossed stone on a cobbled street
Let sunder a whisper never heard In a sun drenched garden- As a withered petal fell from the raceme A timorous lad meandered down a path By a patch of flowers and burden bore Through trills in childish things of future storms, "What a grand day to build tomorrow's bier"
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l S.M. Classroom l Logic/Reason l Free Expression l "Tyler is the sex..."l "All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become. " Buddha
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15-01-2006, 04:21 AM
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Re: Enfer
The way you lighten the mood in the beginning with the flowers really adds weight to the final line. But I'm sure you had intended on that.
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What but design of darkness to appall?-- If design govern in a thing so small.
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15-01-2006, 06:01 AM
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Re: Enfer
Thanks for the comment ambrose.
__________________
l S.M. Classroom l Logic/Reason l Free Expression l "Tyler is the sex..."l "All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become. " Buddha
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15-01-2006, 02:48 PM
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Re: Enfer
"In a sun drenched garden"
Nice description! I could really see it! I also enjoyed the twist. Nice work.
__________________
We are the music makers and we are the dreamers of dreams. -Willie Wonka-
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16-01-2006, 08:48 AM
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Re: Enfer
Thanks Dark for the comment.
__________________
l S.M. Classroom l Logic/Reason l Free Expression l "Tyler is the sex..."l "All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become. " Buddha
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23-01-2006, 12:26 PM
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Re: Enfer
Good poem but what is an enfer?
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Anonomous
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23-01-2006, 12:34 PM
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Re: Enfer
Its french...look it up.
__________________
l S.M. Classroom l Logic/Reason l Free Expression l "Tyler is the sex..."l "All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become. " Buddha
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23-01-2006, 12:37 PM
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Re: Enfer
French ok... I will look into it.
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Anonomous
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13-04-2006, 09:42 PM
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Re: Enfer
lol i try to add a little extra to each...it makes people think
__________________
l S.M. Classroom l Logic/Reason l Free Expression l "Tyler is the sex..."l "All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become. " Buddha
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