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23-05-2007, 09:26 AM
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Bubble
Born in a crash
Of water against shore. Borne by the air, Out of control. All by myself. Floating free. Floating higher. Floating nowhere. Floating somewhere. Tumbling, Bobbing, Weaving. Rising. Drifting. Pop!
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"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams." ~ Arthur William Edgar O'Shaughnessy "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid." ~ Basil King Last edited by Bluejay; 17-08-2007 at 06:10 AM. 
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23-05-2007, 09:37 AM
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Re: Bubble
never had occasion to ponder bubbles, but that was quite nice!
__________________
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23-05-2007, 09:48 AM
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Re: Bubble
Thanks! (But, more importantly, have you ever felt like one?
 )
__________________
"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams." ~ Arthur William Edgar O'Shaughnessy "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid." ~ Basil King
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23-05-2007, 09:55 AM
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Re: Bubble
Quote:
Suddenly, it hit me-it's just a bubble, a damn good poem, and I need to stop drinking so much coffee.
__________________
 “It was the secrets of heaven and earth that I desired to learn”
Victor Frankenstein Last edited by Phonoho; 23-05-2007 at 10:01 AM.
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23-05-2007, 09:58 AM
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Re: Bubble
Quote:
 t smoke that if i were you
__________________
Did you know...points are up for grabs....just for entering... 250 - LIMERICK, CFPC, 55, EMWE, 1000 - TotM, 1000 WC 100 - VOTING IN A CONTEST POLL, YES, JUST VOTING! Comp/Challenges FFFC CFPC 1000-Word Challenge Limerick ToTM EMWE GQC
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23-05-2007, 09:59 AM
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Re: Bubble
Quote:
__________________
Did you know...points are up for grabs....just for entering... 250 - LIMERICK, CFPC, 55, EMWE, 1000 - TotM, 1000 WC 100 - VOTING IN A CONTEST POLL, YES, JUST VOTING! Comp/Challenges FFFC CFPC 1000-Word Challenge Limerick ToTM EMWE GQC
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23-05-2007, 10:27 AM
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Re: Bubble
Quote:
 I'm glad it was acceptable despite any such inaccuracies...
__________________
"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams." ~ Arthur William Edgar O'Shaughnessy "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid." ~ Basil King
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23-05-2007, 10:29 AM
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Re: Bubble
Quote:
 Maybe I ought to...
__________________
"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams." ~ Arthur William Edgar O'Shaughnessy "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid." ~ Basil King
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23-05-2007, 10:33 AM
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Re: Bubble
Quote:
The Science of Saltwater Bubbles sounds like a field manual for an oilfield geologist.
__________________
“It was the secrets of heaven and earth that I desired to learn”
Victor Frankenstein
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24-05-2007, 04:49 AM
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Re: Bubble
Quote:
anywayz jna excellent stuff dont let any1 burst it lol
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24-05-2007, 04:59 AM
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Re: Bubble
Quote:
Quote:
__________________
"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams." ~ Arthur William Edgar O'Shaughnessy "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid." ~ Basil King
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26-05-2007, 11:39 PM
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Re: Bubble
I liked it, though I was expecting some kind of huge deep meaning behind it. Perhaps, ones there and I haven't quite figured it out yet.
Anyways, I like the way the poem truly made you picture a bubble in your head. Having memories of playing with bubbles as a lad, made this poem, alittle nostalgic and something enjoyable to read and think about.
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26-05-2007, 11:53 PM
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Re: Bubble
Thanks, Hakanami. Glad you liked it.
To be honest, I see deep meaning in everything, which is probably a serious flaw on my part...
__________________
"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams." ~ Arthur William Edgar O'Shaughnessy "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid." ~ Basil King
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15-08-2007, 11:13 AM
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Re: Bubble
Hmmm. Not really my favorite. Kind of annoyingly choppy.
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17-08-2007, 05:49 AM
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Re: Bubble
Quote:
Thanks for the comment.
__________________
"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams." ~ Arthur William Edgar O'Shaughnessy "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid." ~ Basil King
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17-08-2007, 06:08 AM
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Re: Bubble
I don't find this choppy at all, or any less smooth than the swirls and dips of a bubble... which suits it quite well considering it is about a bubble! The only suggestion I have is to let the "All by myself" stand alone, so the first and second stanzas form a pattern broken by the loneliness.
I love the "pop" at the end! Hehe reminded me of making bubbles in the backyard as a child which always popped far too soon. Nice one Jay, thoroughly enjoyed
__________________
"when one person suffers from a delusion it is called insanity. When many people suffer from a delusion it is called religion."
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