[awelgraven]

I pledge allegiance, to the flag
of the United States of America.
To the politicians, who lie and steal
and seem to gloss over, every single ideal.
And to the republic, for what little it stands,
for war and the lives, of which it demands.
One nation, under nothing, completely divisible,
and to it's people, the nearly invisible.
From the workers who live from paycheck to paycheck,
to the wealthy estate of a Wal-Mart exec.
With liberty and justice for all who may need it,
except for the homeless, the poor and the rejects.
'Cause this is the country where freedom rings,
as long as those in power, pull the right strings.
But here no longer, reside the tried and the true,
where the red meets the white, and the white meets the blue.


Author's Note: I actually wrote this before ever seeing the similarly constructed poem by LooseyGoosey in the Socio-Political forum. I refrained from posting it, since it sounded so similar, but ultimately, I decided to go ahead with it just to get criticisms and input.

[RENA HANDS]

FIRST AND FOREMOST, I LOVED IT! I once considered writing a similar poem, but I believe that you have done it for me. You have written this poem for a countless number of those who cannot, who are afraid or condemned to speak.

[DarkPower]

I loved it aswell, I have not read loosygooseys poem but I should head over there.

[xtremelady]

Wow very powerful and insightful. You are reflecting the views of a great number of people I imagine. Strange isn't it how perspective's change and the idealism once prescribed to, has been corrupted and twisted by the present western governments! I can really relate to your poem and thought you expressed your point brilliantly. :-}

[loosygoosy007]

That was really good, and I'm glad you posted it. It's similar to mine, but to be honest, I like it a lot better. You put a lot of controversial issues into there that face America today, and that's what I like about it so much. Right on!

[Epsilonist]

Very nice Awelgraven! Very well constructed. I know they are there for rhythm, but I would remove the commas in lines 4 and 14. It will read the same, I think, but a little more clear.

[Coolness]

You certainly have pegged where our country is headed.

[awelgraven]

Wow, the last time I checked here, no one had commented on this one. I'm surprised. That being said, thanks for the encouragement.