[Maylar]

Follow the shadows,
from dream into dream.
And walk through the dark
of centuries passing by.

Covered with soft silence,
of the celestial lights.
Walk, walk,
and don't look behind.

Through dark, through shadow,
through night, you pass...
And dreams will follow,
wrapped in starlight.

With silver mist, that embraces
like a veil...
Don't let the fears
inside you, prevail.

But keep going, running,
from shadow to light.
Beyond the sky,
and past the midnight.

In distances that once,
seamed so far...
Sleep, rest forever,
in light of the stars.

[Lubesh]

Compared to your previous posts from the language point of view, you have come on a lot. Still some minor errors regarding words...trough=through and a link in the line

like veil.....like a veil

Beyond the sky,
and pass the midnight......to pass the midnight or and past the midnight

Other than that, it was very beautiful. Funnily you have 'through' correctly done in ur title.

I have made the corections apart from Like veil

[Maylar]

As always, thank you for the corrections and everything else, Lubesh ...
I changed the rest, as you suggested. And trough=through...just a silly typo, nothing more

[loosygoosy007]

Very beautiful poem. Loved the analogies and the imagery. The only problem I had was with the punctuation. I felt that you used in periods when you perhaps needed commas, such as in the second stanza when you had a period in the second and fourth lines. I think commas would better be suited there for example to help with the flow of the poem. The periods cause a pause in the poem, when I really feel it should continue. Otherwise, great. Looking forward to reading more from you.

[Syrah]

The rhythm was off in a couple places when I read it aloud. Other than that it was a nice read. You are improving. I edited your piece to fix that trough=through typo.

[Nupur]

I agree with Syrah. The rhythm was slightly off. But apart from that, according to me, it was a beautifully written piece rich in imagery. Good work!

[lunar]

this is a good riff on a very basic concept,well done.