[Corneac]

I’ve lost my pen amongst the scabbards
of curling cigarette butts,
the scrunched-up-paper-of-non-poetry,
scrunched and punched in creases
like the poet I used to be,

I lost a placard with your name on it
a denoting of what once was,
scrawled in bolded ink
like a poet ‘s love-
once so finitely defined
and so nicely aligned

now tumbled like a metaphor
amongst your hand-me-downs,
no colour fast, to hold fast meaning
weaning shades or unloved off-white
and pinkish scrawl,
of red, like love, alight,

you hung me out to dry
like a rag, against the sky,
a brilliant blue
to my now faded hue,
and the wind, as if to taunt,
threw up my clothes
and like pride,
he muttered a gasping breath
“this is all that is left,
all that is left”
and retuned you to the sky,

I felt your hold clothes pegs once,
Us, against the world,
the wind to taunt –
the sky to saunt’
but we held fast
like colour
a poem
a lie

[Vorcla]

Man, for someone who says he's having trouble writing, you sure are on a roll. And I would say, judging from this, that you haven't lost any speed off your fast ball.

Chris, the images here are top notch. Very vivid; I like the onomonapoetic devices you use - "scrunched;" "punched." And you rhyme them to boot!

There's a resigned tone to this, but I'm also picking up a sense of hope, like "hey, I'm going to get past this and move on."

Well, you're two-for-two so far this morning.

[Rain]

Imagery was amazing in this one Chris, really was. I liked the whole thing, but I didn't love it, I can see where (like you said when this was done you were having trouble writing yes?) it was done, like excess idea and writing in your mind,so you got them out so it was bound to come out somewhat sloppy. Like this didn't exactly have a stanza form, it really read like it was done for venting purposes, and that was it's strength and weakness it felt like for me, it was packed with raw emotion and passion I wanna say, but then again lacked the quality that you usually create in your poems, the quality that as well gets the emotion and passion through your words. So this basically, for me, was good, but I can see where you would say you were having a hard time, because like I said, in Chris like poems it has intense quality while spitting out passion, emotion, metaphors, complexity, and a quality not many that I know can match, and this seemed to only have to passion and emotion, in a similar form but lacking the beauty you usually conjure up into your poetry. Still, for struggling, this was pretty damn good man.

-Taylor