[Corneac]

Update the world, would you?
On the interlude between two,
As if they care,
And broadcast a bulletin,
Perhaps the one you want to see,
Is the same one,
Hunting, scrounging, for pieces of me,

And my capitalization is a mess,
But it looks right to me, I think,
Cause indecision and pointlessness
Have caught be unawares,
As my greatest enemy,

And my thoughts are meandering
And sort of dawdle,
Like the child you, ten feet behind,
Lost in a world,
Where destination is but an inclination
I dawdle, immortal,
If only I cared
That I’m running late

[Venomous Vixen]

Have caught be unawares,

me?

Like the child you, ten feet behind,

Like the child in you? perhaps you forgot a word here?

It is so odd to see you revert back to capitalizing the first letter of each line... odd indeed. What's up Booger? You know... I was a bit lost with this one. There is power in it, a sense of "I don't give a fuck what you do, this is me" bit the point you are making is perhaps too personal, or maybe I know you too well to see the bigger picture.

Regardless I always enjoy reading your work, there is conviction in your words and it is always powerful. Sometimes it is a bit like being a child reading a novel far beyond my years... but all the same I get the feeling and understand how powerful it is.

[Vorcla]

This might be your best ever - the title is really cryptic and powerful. It's more controlled and polished than some of your stuff (that's not a criticism; in your case, you do "raw" very well! ). I really like it; gonna nominate it for a POTM.

[dearest]

Hmmm...I quite like this, though it's a bit unconventional. You're just sort of plopping down whatever is on your mind into this poem and I, at least, got out of it that you're saying "this is art. Prove me wrong." Love the idea, the convoluted metaphor, everything, really. Very well done.

[Nupur]

I agree with Fire and everyone else who posted here. Wonderful poem, Chris. It's incredibly powerful. Er... why is it in the amateur section? It's pretty good, and in my opinion deserves to be under the advanced section.