[Masa]

Whitest waters embrace the shores,
Bluest skies comfort the leaves,
A bit of dirt tracking the floors,
My old shoes stuck in the reaves,
The remains of a good lifetime,
A shame it will ever end.

Blue eyes hiding in golden curls,
Yellow bonnet in the wind,
Watch over my three little girls,
Small talk with a dear old friend,
The remains of a nice lifetime,
I hope it won't ever end.

Green meadows with a thin gray whisp,
Purple dress with tiny beads,
A warm red fire, a cousin's lisp,
Out with my son, planting seeds,
The remains of a sweet lifetime,
Don't think it can really end.

[Rain]

That was nice Masa, had very nice imagery through the whole thing. At some parts it seemed to lose it's flow

Green meadows with a thin gray smoke,
Purple dress with tiny beads,
A warm blazing red of fire poked,
Out with my son, planting seeds,

That part didn't flow too well for me, but this part did.

Blue eyes hiding in golden curls,
Yellow bonnet in the wind,
Watch over my three little girls,
Small talk with a dear old friend,

I enjoy your writing very much Masa, and I hope you continue because you have always been one of my favorite poets. Glad to have you back

[Masa]

Thanks Altair, and what better to spend my study period than fixing my poems?

[Venomous Vixen]

Ah Masa, I have missed your poetry! This was beautiful, great images and a nice little form too. I enjoyed the repetition in the last two lines of each stanza, with a slight change and almost a completely different meaning. You opening lines were grabbers, incredible imagery right off of the bat. Well done!

[Serac]

That was a good read, my friend. It was very soothing, but at the same time a little melancholy. More than anything, though, it was tranquil. Simple, but awesome. I'll say it again: I tend to hate poetry, but not yours. Weird.

[Masa]

Thank you Syrah, I'm happy to see your happy comments and it makes me feel foolish for ever leaving in the first place.

And Serac, my boon companion and dear friend! My arts are for mortal eyes, and yet I am pleased to see a kami enjoy it so! Very glad to see you again, and hope that this writer can keep you amused for ages to come.

[Venomous Vixen]

Originally Posted by Masa

Thank you Syrah, I'm happy to see your happy comments and it makes me feel foolish for ever leaving in the first place.

>.< Bri Bri Bri or Venomous !!

[Masa]

Holy blast, how'd I get that confused? Sorry Venom, curse my insolent tongue!

[Lubesh]

Don't think it can really end.

yep definitely a miss your hallamrks and writing...welcome back!

[Masa]

My thanks, Lubesh, you humble me with your comment!

[RENA HANDS]

Such simplicity and sincerity!

The imageries were superb!

Just a question…Green meadows with a thin gray whisps,

Should it be…

Green meadows with a thin gray wisp,

Is this another English spelling situation…

I give happily 5/5!

[Masa]

Oh blast. Thank you RENA, your assistance only makes me a better writer!

Whoo, 5/5 means perfect score, guess who's going to party tonight!? Not me, I'm tired.

[xtremelady]

Lovely, brought a smile to my lips. Simple pleasures often overlooked and taken for granted. Great message and wonderfully written – simply awesome.

[Masa]

I thank you madam, for such an exquisite synopsis of my small poem, and I hope you take the message to heart, for that is the only way to live one's life!