[Venus]

Rhythmic hips rock back and forth,
as hot breath scalds my skin.

Moaning penetrates my gentle ears,
and explodes from deep within.

Sticky fingers slide and glide,
moving around my most precious parts.

Each entry sending waves through me,
and a fluttering straight to my heart.

My breath catches with sudden force,
as pleasure holds court deep within me.

And as quickly as the moment came,
it leaves a limp and tired body.

Finished, I'm left with catching breath,
trembling thighs and a lifted spirit.

My lover and I, completely spent,
and you wonder how two girls do it?

[Corneac]

Hahahahahaha....wait...I can think....yeah, not wonderingm can imagine it. I mean, hahaha...good to have you back. Dirty poems! Regaining steam...although not your best, bloody good. Awesome. As usual, perfect rhythm, and vivid, sort of real decriptions y'know...like, not feigned...but real...yeah, I'm rambling.

Sticky fingers slide and glide,

That was..yeah...vivid. But of all them posessed that lyrical, but still paint-a-picture in my head quality. Pure Venus and kickass. Well done mate.

[Corneac]

By the way...yes you are a jackass

[Venus]

lol. Thanks Chris. But so are you.

[Vorcla]

Ha, ha - I like "warning - explicit." I seem to have to put that on a lot of my own stuff. Nice work. I think a lot of guys have fantasies about "Two Girls" - sometimes they project themselves into the fantasy as well. Thanks for sharing - very hot.

[Venomous Vixen]

Very nice Venus, love that last line, isn't that always the question! Your flow was fantastic and as Chris mentioned, you got quite graphic in parts. It is so good to have you back, now I know what I have been missing!

[Lubesh]

Yep,,,simple but urs....now concentrate! great to have u back. I haven't spilled a cuppa in ages cept forv orcla's rendiitons. lol

[lizmarienv]

Stimulamos Stimulamos orgasmo! Sorry I just watched "let me barrow that top" I liked this, it was went right to the point. It was graphic but I didn't get "grossed out" by it, which I often find when reading literature of this nature. Good job!

[jaziz69]

I'm goin to have to add to that rapture of rhythmis appreciation in this piece, even your blatant rhyme felt subtle.
Vivid to effect, not too extreme. Nice nice.

Haha, the sound penetrated your ear.
Sorry, just me trying to make the most of what's left of my teenage immaturity, i'm twenty in two weeks And i'm sorry, i know that's not old, but it is when you still get ID'd for scratch cards!

Much love

[Rain]

That was dirty as hell, and I loved it. You kept in rythm, it was a great poem. I can't say anything bad about it. Good job =)

[Timmay]

altair, you would love it, sick bastard. =P

I don't know what to think about it. it isn't bad, but it's just a little weird. nothing out of the ordinary (as far as weirdness goes).

I dunno. The more i think about it, the better it becomes. Once you over come the inicial shock of it all, it's actually deep. and if your thought process is like mine, i think i see the metaphor.

well done.

[Phonoho]

If this were designed to be titillating, it is, but only just so. Not enough to warrant the explicit warning, as we do have racier pieces here which do not have one.
Equivocal and mildly androgynous until your closing line, which feels anticlimactic and gratuitous, as if you were hoping to affront. It disrupts your seductive and near-reverent tone like a punchline, ending on a smirking, almost raspberry note, showing your disdain for those who would disapprove. But we're all players here.

[Venus]

It was meant to be a punch line.

[PaulJJ]

Wow. lol loved it. You went staright to the point, could almost imagine it happening right in front of me lol. very descriptive.