| Notices |
 |
|
|
LinkBack | Thread Tools |
Rating: 
|
Display Modes |
02-04-2005, 01:59 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Dark of Night
The forest was dark
Tall oaks looming above The hooting of the night owl I crept along quietly Fearing to wake anything I was seeking the white doe Gracefull was its walk Proudly did it hold its head up Commanding respect from me Though I was thoughtless to give it I crept through the dark forest Silently seeking my prey Creeping through the forest A glimpse of white catches my eye And another passes by My bow is drawn Its strength I know The white is still as it comes in to view Back my bow An arrow silent and deadly goes A low whistle reaches its ears Proud face Facing its worst fear Last edited by The Druid; 02-04-2005 at 07:35 PM. 
|
| Sponsored Links |
|
02-04-2005, 07:39 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Dark of night
nice but something is missing! can't place it but reading that poem left me with a feeling of it being incomplete. will tell you as soon as i know what it is. and i guess you wanted it to be in the nature sub-category. i think it doesn't fit in there. am open to suggestions.
__________________
Consistency is contrary to nature, contrary to life. The only completely consistent people are the dead! Last edited by The Druid; 02-04-2005 at 07:51 PM.
|
|
04-04-2005, 07:23 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Dark of Night
I like this. Its nice to see you move in different directions. You have a great imagination and once you harness it I feel you will be very good.
|
|
05-04-2005, 01:51 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Dark of Night
Well i did kinda want it to be in nature but thats ok it doesnt really matter. I dont know really what is up with that one. its kinda weird. I dont think i finished it properly.
|
|
06-04-2005, 06:40 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Dark of Night
Yes, it is nice to see such prolific writing from an enthusiast who clearly has a talent to boot!
You are very lucky. Keep it up.
|
|
06-04-2005, 07:44 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Dark of Night
well thank you lubesh. I really didnt think you were mean
|
|
13-04-2005, 02:51 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Dark of Night
ok have shifted it to nature as you wished.
__________________
Consistency is contrary to nature, contrary to life. The only completely consistent people are the dead!
|
|
13-04-2005, 04:37 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Dark of Night
Thank you
|
|
16-11-2007, 06:51 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Dark of Night
this is so quiet, fantastic setting and feeling to this poem. I almost whispered it in my head. pretty cool
__________________
come to send, not condescend transcendental consequence is to transcend where we are who are we? who we are
|
|
08-06-2008, 05:38 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Dark of Night
This poem was a gracefull glimpse of a silent and deadly side of nature.Good job.
|
|
08-06-2008, 06:07 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Dark of Night
Very nice work!!!!!!!!.
__________________
Not everything makes sense , except to those who have lived it
|
|
08-06-2008, 07:41 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Dark of Night
A very fascinating and captivating image. I rate 3/5!
__________________
Right, I'll keep to the present but just take a glance at the past. Damn, is this poetry?
|
|
09-06-2008, 01:15 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Re: Dark of Night
This really a good poem. As deadman said, I actually did whisper in my head. Made you feel like you were there when it happened. Also, it ends it with a loophole that the deer may not have been killed. You wrote a proud face facing its worst fear. It kinda leads that its worst fear is a hunter, not death, but thats just me in my mind.
__________________
Concentrating on something is simply a small factor that deals with focusing. To truly focus on something, you must understand how that something works from the inside view of it.
|
|
| Bookmarks |
| Tags |
| None |
| Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests) | |
| Thread Tools | |
| Display Modes | Rate This Thread |
|
|
Linear Mode
